• 𝕽𝖚𝖆𝖎𝖉𝖍𝖗𝖎𝖌𝖍@midwest.social
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    7 months ago

    I’m also a not-so-young dude - forgotten generation - and honestly I don’t remember guys being like this. At least, not to women’s faces. Being rejected sucks and is a hit to your self-image, so there was the occasional after-the-fact, booze-fueled name-calling while among the guys, but to must of us, being rejected was something we were embarrassed about and didn’t advertise by sharing.

    Our generations - boomers, gen-x - are selfish, greedy, and short sighted. OTOH, from survey of N=1 (my wife) getting this sort of response from men wasn’t a concern.

    • The Stoned Hacker@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      I mean there is also a massive amount of underreporting of sexual violence from that time and if you were born a man then there’s a good chance that if you were respectful you may have never been in the room where someone was getting assaulted or harassed. That’s not your fault, I’m glad you might not have been one of the shitty people to hurt others, but I’m pretty sure this shit has been happening a long time.

      coming from a no-so-old dude who believes in respect and vibing.

      • 𝕽𝖚𝖆𝖎𝖉𝖍𝖗𝖎𝖌𝖍@midwest.social
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        7 months ago

        Rape is another matter. Rape has been prevelant and underreported since, well, forever; and I doubt the rates of rape have gone down. In fact, since the definition of rape has been increasingly broadened, sexual violence crime rates have almost certainly been increasing.

        The meme, and myself, were not talking about rape, or inequality, or being not being able to vote. I was only talking about women today being increasingly afraid to turn down men.

    • fidodo@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Why would you remember guys being like this if you’re not a woman? Obviously you would not experience this situation if you were never in this situation because you’re a man. This interaction is going to happen where you don’t see them. Just ask some women around you if they’ve ever been scared by the response of a man they rejected. You’ll find that the majority of women have.

      • 𝕽𝖚𝖆𝖎𝖉𝖍𝖗𝖎𝖌𝖍@midwest.social
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        7 months ago

        sigh

        If you look back, I mentioned my highly scientific survey, which consisted my of asking my wife. Whence comes my observation.

        My point has been that I’m betting that the age group of the women you ask is significant. It’d be an interesting study.

        • yeah@feddit.uk
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          7 months ago

          I’d be interested as I reckon it’s cross ages.

          Like when the contraceptive pill came in it made it harder for a lot of women to say no to having sex as they couldn’t say they were worried about pregnancy. - so even then women needed a tolerated reason to say no to men.

    • VinnyDaCat@lemmy.world
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      7 months ago

      Being rejected sucks and is a hit to your self-image

      A hit to your self-esteem maybe but you look all the better if you handle it nicely. If only guys understood that concept.

        • VinnyDaCat@lemmy.world
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          7 months ago

          How so? I never said you weren’t supposed to feel bad or that you couldn’t. Lick your wounds if you want. Just don’t lash out over it.

          It will make you a genuinely more likeable person if you don’t lash out at someone for rejecting you. No sane person wants to date an individual with a temper like that, especially if you put it on display before the relationship even begins.