• MrJameGumb@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    27
    ·
    7 months ago

    “right, so he comes back to life after 3 days… I guess its kind of like in one of those zombie movies you like so much? But then there’s a bunny too you see, and he gives out chocolate and jelly beans. No, there wasn’t any chocolate or jelly beans in the Bible. Nor any bunnies either… The bunny is actually from an older thing from pre Christianity but we just kinda added it in afterwards. Yeah that happens a lot. Does it all make sense to you now?”

    • Punkie@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      25
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      7 months ago

      That doesn’t even cover the issues of explaining how they figure out what DAY it is every year.

      “Okay, so they start by figuring out when the Earth has the most direct sun on the the Tropic of Cancer… no, not the disease, a giant crab… it’s a line of latitude approximately 23°27′ north of Earth’s Equator, right? Yes, there’s math. Anyway, the take the day the sun is strongest and weakest, called the solstices, and … the solstices… It doesn’t matter, It mattered for agriculture back then, especially when spring and fall were, which are the calendar dates in between them, yeah? So the spring equinox ,., that’s what they call the ‘in between solstices,’ equinox… which is March 21st or 22nd or something. What? No no, I am explaining how they figure out when easter is. I haven’t forgotten. So now we know when the spring equinox is, so now we look at a chart of the moon, and figure out when it is full. Full. No, not ‘full of what?’ it’s full meaning that you can see all of in the sky. Well one half of it, actually. The sunlit half, but it’s FACING us, see… The sun lights up and it shows as a circle instead of a crescent or something. Moving on, they look at the FIRST Sunday AFTER the FIRST full moon that occurs on or after the spring equinox. Except if the full moon falls on a Sunday, then Easter is the next Sunday. Why? Well, St. Bede the Venerable, the 6th-century author of Historia ecclesiastica gentis Anglorum (‘Ecclesiastical History of the English People’), maintains that the English word ‘Easter’ comes from Eostre, or Eostrae, the Anglo-Saxon goddess of spring and fertility. That’s where the Spring Equinox comes in. NO I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP!”

    • bitchkat@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      5
      ·
      7 months ago

      I’ve always assumed that Scotty beamed him up to the ship where he spent 3 days in medical having Bones fix him before they beamed him back down.

    • Dandroid@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      7 months ago

      right, so he comes back to life after 3 days…

      I never understood how Friday to Sunday is 3 days. There’s one full day between them.

      • Mike@lemmy.ml
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        7 months ago

        I believe the prophecy was “on the third day He will rise again” not after 3 days.

        • Dandroid@sh.itjust.works
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          7 months ago

          I still feel like most people would count Sunday as the second day. Unless musicians are the ones counting.

          • chatokun@lemmy.dbzer0.com
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            7 months ago

            Days started at sundown for the jews at the time. If he was killed during what we consider the day time Friday, then maybe Friday sundown is second and sat sundown third? Googling it, I see some sites agree, or say that he might have been crucified after Sundown Thursday, and in the tomb Thursday night, which would be Friday.

            • Manmoth@lemmy.ml
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              1
              ·
              7 months ago

              Not sure but I think you are right here. The Orthodox calendar still works this way.