I know this is a controversial take but regular Alcoholics Anonymous is also a bit of a cult. It does a lot of good but there are aspects of it that don’t sit right with me.
My dad became a radically different person after attending AA, and not all for the better. He became deeply religious and a bit paranoid. He called me once and told me I should hide ramen noodles and bottled water under my bed and to not tell my roommate about it. That was meant for me when the world ended. He started donating money to some kind of Jewish/Israeli fund.
He quit his job out of nowhere and then didn’t go back to work at all, living in the remains of his retirement fund. He died about a year later at the age of 50.
I’m sure he has his own mental health issues and that behavior wasn’t all from attending AA, but my sister and I do believe AA contributed to some of it.
I’m glad it works for some people. I don’t want to discourage anyone from seeking help, but choose who you follow with caution.
I think the reputation is partially earned. I’ve been in a few AA and AA-like groups over the years, and while I wouldn’t say that AA itself is a cult, there are cults that use AA and similar recovery groups as recruiting grounds, and it’s very possible that your dad got caught up in one of those. The sudden taking up of a new and very specific charitable cause is a big red flag.
Hard agree with your last point. I was fortunate enough to (eventually…) find a network of peers that helped me and I am doing much better now than I was, but it is a bitter truth that there are people who will find you when you’re at your lowest and most vulnerable, and exploit you. I’m sorry your dad wasn’t able to get the help he needed ❤️
Its not a controversial take, lots of us in the sober community don’t mesh with AA. I would never bash another persons path to sobriety, but the way they look at people who get sober working the steps vs people who chose other paths doesn’t sit great with me. I also don’t like the direction AA steers people to feel helplessness around addiction and giving your recovery to a “higher power”. But like I said - what works for some may not work for others, and I would never stop anyone from finding and walking the right path to recovery from them, as I have for myself.
If you see this and you are looking to experience sobriety and you are not feeling like AA is for you, there is lots of options out there like, Allen Carr’s Easyway, SMART recovery and Recovery Dharma just to name a few. But also please if you are struggling, feel free to DM me. I am always happy to talk.
It’s not unheard of, but if AA is a cult it’s the dumbest cult ever invented. No dues, go/don’t go, do the steps (“which are ‘suggested’”) or don’t, don’t give your right name - shit if all cults worked like that they’d have to invent something else.
That said, some AA people are too Jesusy or big-book-y or frankly just bog standard racist or whatever and shouldn’t be held as representative.
It’s the case that a lot of people self-medicate with alcohol, then give up alcohol and don’t address the reason they were self-medicating appropriately. Basically becoming sober-and-unmedicated. Which ain’t great.
AA is from the 1930’s when the options were death, jail, or an insane asylum. It’s right to adapt it in places for what works best. People first coming in need solid, decent people to just be there and hang out. But that’s all. After about the first year more-or-less it can become what the person wants out of it.
But this place that Carr was a part of? That’s super fucked up.
I know this is a controversial take but regular Alcoholics Anonymous is also a bit of a cult. It does a lot of good but there are aspects of it that don’t sit right with me.
My dad became a radically different person after attending AA, and not all for the better. He became deeply religious and a bit paranoid. He called me once and told me I should hide ramen noodles and bottled water under my bed and to not tell my roommate about it. That was meant for me when the world ended. He started donating money to some kind of Jewish/Israeli fund.
He quit his job out of nowhere and then didn’t go back to work at all, living in the remains of his retirement fund. He died about a year later at the age of 50.
I’m sure he has his own mental health issues and that behavior wasn’t all from attending AA, but my sister and I do believe AA contributed to some of it.
I’m glad it works for some people. I don’t want to discourage anyone from seeking help, but choose who you follow with caution.
I think the reputation is partially earned. I’ve been in a few AA and AA-like groups over the years, and while I wouldn’t say that AA itself is a cult, there are cults that use AA and similar recovery groups as recruiting grounds, and it’s very possible that your dad got caught up in one of those. The sudden taking up of a new and very specific charitable cause is a big red flag.
Hard agree with your last point. I was fortunate enough to (eventually…) find a network of peers that helped me and I am doing much better now than I was, but it is a bitter truth that there are people who will find you when you’re at your lowest and most vulnerable, and exploit you. I’m sorry your dad wasn’t able to get the help he needed ❤️
Its not a controversial take, lots of us in the sober community don’t mesh with AA. I would never bash another persons path to sobriety, but the way they look at people who get sober working the steps vs people who chose other paths doesn’t sit great with me. I also don’t like the direction AA steers people to feel helplessness around addiction and giving your recovery to a “higher power”. But like I said - what works for some may not work for others, and I would never stop anyone from finding and walking the right path to recovery from them, as I have for myself.
If you see this and you are looking to experience sobriety and you are not feeling like AA is for you, there is lots of options out there like, Allen Carr’s Easyway, SMART recovery and Recovery Dharma just to name a few. But also please if you are struggling, feel free to DM me. I am always happy to talk.
It’s not unheard of, but if AA is a cult it’s the dumbest cult ever invented. No dues, go/don’t go, do the steps (“which are ‘suggested’”) or don’t, don’t give your right name - shit if all cults worked like that they’d have to invent something else.
That said, some AA people are too Jesusy or big-book-y or frankly just bog standard racist or whatever and shouldn’t be held as representative.
It’s the case that a lot of people self-medicate with alcohol, then give up alcohol and don’t address the reason they were self-medicating appropriately. Basically becoming sober-and-unmedicated. Which ain’t great.
AA is from the 1930’s when the options were death, jail, or an insane asylum. It’s right to adapt it in places for what works best. People first coming in need solid, decent people to just be there and hang out. But that’s all. After about the first year more-or-less it can become what the person wants out of it.
But this place that Carr was a part of? That’s super fucked up.